Friday, December 30, 2011

Riding Tigers

My husband and I were having a very important conversation yesterday. It needs to be shared in order to speed up any current research, and possibly provide funding to said research.

Steven and I would like to live in a world where, one day, in our son's lifetime, he will have the option to ride a tiger... like a horse... without fear of being mauled. We have no idea where this idea came from...

The first step to doing this will be to domesticate the tigers. "Won't that take centuries of breeding?", you say. Hopefully not. This study, by researchers at the Russian Academy of Sciences and Cornell University has found it possible to domesticate wild foxes within 40 generations. This particular study began in 1959, and has produced a fox with similar behaviors to a dog. Considering that tigers reach breeding age at 3 years and advancements in human longevity, Quinn may indeed get the chance to ride a tiger.

Of course, creating a rideable tiger is more difficult that domesticating a fox, what with the endangeredness and likelihood of being mauled. This is why it is imperative to find your nearest Tiger Institute of Genetic Enhancement for Riding (TIGER) facility and donate money or volunteer your time to their research. Together, we can create a world where we can ride tigers.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Bad Habits, Part One: Unnecessary supplies

Much like "Irrational Fears", I have a feeling that "Bad Habits" will be a reoccurring theme.

Today's bad habit: Buying craft/sewing supplies that I'm not going to use any time soon.

As I mentioned in my last post, I had bought nearly everything I needed for that Sherlock Holmes costume, which has since gathered dust in my studio/basement. This is hardly the first time this has happened. You don't even want to see my wig collection.

Here's what happens:

Step 1: I get excited about a character/costume/idea/project. Most of the time this happens while I am intoxicated.

Step 2: I diligently declare my desire to follow through on said character/costume/idea/project. Usually while still drunk.

Step 3: In a desire to stay true to my word, I start buying supplies. Sometimes I'm still drunk for this part. That makes getting my purchases much more fun, because sometimes I don't remember what they are, and usually I impulse buy extra stuff for which I have no need. This is how I ended up with a 10-pack of taxidermied lizards. Apparently, they don't come individually. Lesson learned.

Step 4: (Optional) Start project!

Step 5: Get distracted with new idea and start process over again.

Now, sometimes I actually finish a project. And this is a proud moment where I can say that I have triumphed over my ADHD and actually have something to show for it. I'm actually really good about finishing things for other people, be it a commission or a gift. I'm even good at consistently finishing my costumes before I wear them to a convention (though sometimes they are finished at 2am the night before).

What I'm not good at finishing is all the little projects that seem like great ideas when I buy the supplies. For example, I bought a silk-screening machine with the intention of offering custom designs in my etsy store. It is still in the box. I bought it two years ago. Really, one of these days, I will break it out, and it will be seem like Christmas. Hopefully, the company that makes it will still be in business then, and I will still be able to buy replacement supplies.

But my biggest supply-buying transgression is definitely beading and jewelry supplies. I've been planning on offering jewelry in my etsy store for years now. I actually do sell some stuff at conventions, but I never get around to listing it on etsy. In the meantime, I keep buying beads and trinkets that I think will make awesome jewelry. Perhaps I was a magpie in a past life... the way I collect shiny baubles and beads. Today I added to my growing bead supply wasteland:

This is a pound of tagua nut beads in a cool linen sack. It was $16 at my local organic grocery store. I hope that's a good price... don't tell me if it's not.

I'm really a sucker for tagua nuts. I think it's so cool that a nut could look like ivory. Combine that with some fond memories of my grandmother's partner showing and explaining what tagua nuts were and how they looked in their natural form (like little coconuts), and the fact that I used one in my friend's Elizabeth Swann cosplay... well, I just couldn't pass this up.

So I immediately brought them home to take a picture of them, and yes, play with them and sort through them.... aaaaaand then add them to my beading pile of supplies that I may never get to. But here's to hoping they won't just collect dust!

And, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to conjure up my next big project and unnecessary expenditures.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Sherlock Holmes' Amazing Costumes

I keep seeing previews for the new Sherlock Holmes movie... and damn, I am always drooling over the costumes. I'm a sucker for a well-tailored period suit:

And fancy suits:
Even the women's clothes are drool-inducing (well, they were always drool-inducing, but I would even consider making them):

Of course, I can't up and try to recreate these costumes. I'm still supposed to be fixing up and re-doing my studio (another post on that later)... And then I need to re-open my Etsy store... all, while juggling my new roles as mother and housewife (while playing Skyrim). Not to mention that I already bought all the stuff to make this Holmes' outfit from the first movie:

Those particular supplies are still sitting in my closet, untouched.

But I did do a dork-tastic make-up test to see if I could pull it off when the first movie came out:

Yeah, I'm a huge, cross-dressing nerd.... But I know you're jealous of my cool pipe.

Where was I?
Oh yeah!

I need to work on staying focused and actually finishing projects that I started. But I may have to get a baby-sitter so I can see the new movie. Who knows, I might even pay attention to the plot instead of just the costumes.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

To the Post Office, With Love

I love my local post office. With my job at Feral Works (the first of many shameless plugs), I try to ship out orders about 3 times a week... So I've become very familiar with the Bay View post office.

I have a lot of respect for these guys. They work long hours, on their feet all day, and they deal with some of the most irritable people on earth. With the cuts the government made to the postal system this year, they had to close a number of offices and lay off a number of employees. This means that the post offices that are still open are stretched thinner than ever. So yeah, there's long lines, which sucks, but patience is a virtue. I've heard these folks get reamed on a regular basis from people who are inconvenienced by standing in a line for ten minutes.

Postal employees have my respect. They are always happy to see me, even though I never bring them packages that are liquid, fragile or potentially hazardous (boring, right?). So today, I brought them some cupcakes I made:

Hopefully, this will brighten up what is certainly a stressful holiday season for them.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Irrational Fears: Part One

I have a feeling this will be a series of posts, since I have a lot of irrational fears. Today's featured fear: Sock Monkeys

Okay, it's not really a fear, so much as being really creeped out. Like how people are creeped out by clowns (which are a healthy and rational fear, by the way).

Here's my reasons:

1. Traditionally, Sock monkeys are made from.... wait for it.... socks!
Socks that have been on someone's gross wart-infected, toenail fungus-y, sweaty feet. Why would you want to cuddle with that?

2. They only wear a hat. Why? Easy access. Probably because they were just throwing their sockly feces at someone. Or, you know, playing with their little sock.

3. Those creepy button eyes. I have to admit that the movie (and yes, the book) Coraline didn't help in this regard.

Finally, the biggest reason I'm irrationally afraid of sock monkeys...

Those creepy red mouths.

No creature in nature has a mouth that red unless they just gorged upon another living creature. I'm pretty sure that sock monkeys come to life when you are sleeping and feast upon your innards.... probably your soul too. It's a risk I'm not willing to take.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Making it work

I'm trying really hard to make the drawing portion of this blog work.

Problem is that I am computer stupid. I have a tablet, but I'm having trouble understanding which programs to use with it, and simply how to use it. So I'm trying to use a sketchpad app on my Kindle Fire.

Anyway, here's a couple of drawings I did on my Fire of my dogs:


And Josie:

I'm not really happy with the sizes or how these turned out in general. I might have to actually learn something and figure out how to use my tablet. Or just draw the old-fashioned way.

Back to the drawing board!!

(I love bad puns, fyi)